8 Subtle Signs He’s Sleeping With Someone Else

signs he's sleeping with someone else

Ideally, you find the perfect man—one you can trust, one you love, one you makes your insides melt, one who values you for all that you are, one that makes you more.

But it can take you a long time to find that man, and in the meantime, it can take some searching.

And, perhaps, some suspicion. If you see enough of these signs in your relationship, no matter how new or old, no matter how exciting or tested – it may be time to start paying a little more attention, because he just may be cheating on you and sleeping with someone else.

So what signs should you be watching for? Check out this list of subtle signs he’s sleeping with someone else.

One last note of caution before we jump in: These signs don’t necessarily mean he’s sleeping with someone else. You’ll still have to do your own detective work, or, depending on the relationship you have with him, ask him.

But these signs are frequently present when a guy cheats, so keep an eye out for them. Alright, here goes:

They take their time responding to your calls or texts

Of course, this isn’t a surefire signs he’s sleeping with someone else – it could just be that they’re busy, or it could be that they’re trying to put some distance between you—or it could be a sign that they’re with someone else, which is obviously not something you want.

This is especially concerning as a sign if they’ve historically been the kind of guy that immediately responds to your calls or texts.

Similarly, if there has never been a screen lock on their phone, but now suddenly there is, it may be that they’re trying to hide their call or text history from you.

Partners don’t hide things from each other, so be on the watch for these kind of behaviors; even if he isn’t cheating on you, odds are good you don’t have much of a future if he’s hiding from you in these ways.

Late nights and changes in plans

One of the more tell tale signs he’s sleeping with someone else is when their schedule changes unexpectedly, more often or they’re suddenly working more late nights.

Yes, sometimes peoples’ work schedule changes. This is one of those places to listen to your intuition. Has he always had a very steady work schedule, but now all of the sudden he’s regularly telling you he has to work late, that can be something to keep an eye on.

It could be that they’ve picked up an extra time-consuming project and they really are working late, but there are ways to get a feel for this. For instance, consider calling his place of work one of the nights he’s working late.

If he’s there, you know that he actually is working late—and you can tell him you were thinking about him, maybe even give him something to look forward to when he gets off work. If he’s not there, though, you know he’s lying to you.

Again, this isn’t sure proof he’s sleeping with someone else. For instance, maybe he’s lying about working late because he’s doing something else (or picked up a second job), but in either case, the fact that he lied to you should be concerning and worth further investigation, whether that’s trying to figure out what he actually does or point-blank asking him about it.

They jump in the shower immediately after getting home

Obviously, there are good reasons to jump in the shower when first home. For instance, maybe they just got back from the gym and they’re disgustingly sweaty. Or maybe they were helping a friend move. Or maybe they’re just the kind of guy who always showers after work. That’s not the sort of behavior to be concerned about.

Instead, I mean this behavior is concerning if it isn’t normal for them. And it may be a sign that they’re in a hurry to wash off the sex smell of the person they’re sleeping with off.

For other cheating men, this may be a lack of intimacy when they first get home, a need to jump in the bathroom or otherwise gather themselves before they can give themselves to you.

Unless they’re more emotionally damaged than most men I know, juggling relationships (even if one or more of them is only physical) is hard. It takes a toll.

Taking a shower or otherwise seeming strangely withdrawn when first with you can be a sign of them needing time to switch from one relationship (their relationship with the person they’re sleeping with on the side) to another (with you).

You don’t feel valued

If they’ve historically been very attentive to you, your needs, and your emotions, but suddenly aren’t, that’s a pretty clear sign that they aren’t valuing you the way they previously have.

Yes, there are other possible explanations: Perhaps they’re feeling bogged down in their own issues, or have a lot on their mind, and as such aren’t as able to give you the same attention.

But it can also be that they don’t value you the same way they had, and that’s a problem, whether that’s because they’re lavishing that attention on someone else or simply pulling away.

If they’ve historically been very attentive to you, and now aren’t? That’s a sign your relationship isn’t in a good place, and you need to talk with him about what’s going on.

Maybe he simply needs to recommit himself to you and the future the two of you are trying to build together, or maybe he needs to be honest with you that he doesn’t see you in his future—but either way, you deserve better and his full attention. So if he isn’t giving you that, bring it up.

Their sexual behavior changes

Again, this doesn’t have to be a sign of cheating or sleeping with someone else. It can be that they’re simply trying to spice things up with you, or that they’re trying to find new ways to please you.

Sometimes changes in the bedroom are a good thing—especially if you like the new moves or he finds a new way to drive you crazy, for instance.

But if there are changes in sexual behavior, it’s worth investigating more. If it’s a new position, for instance, there are ways to ask about it without putting them on the defensive. Maybe he’s simply done some research (or picked it up from a porno), but it could also be that he picked it up from a new partner.

It can even be that you notice that they’re simply less present when you have sex. It can be that he has something else on his mind, but if it’s a regular occurrence, you should consider that he may just be going through the motions—because he’d rather be sleeping with someone else, for instance.

More concerning yet for you is if they’ve previously been a tiger, completely insatiable, and no regularly have excuses or just seemingly want less sex.

While this can be the result of outside stressors in their life (for instance, if work has been absolutely nuts for them lately, they really may just be too worn down), it can also be a sign that they’re getting that appetite sated elsewhere.

Of course, there is also the possibility that they’re simply distancing themselves from you, too. If your relationship has been in a funk for a while, this is also a possibility.

They become evasive in normal conversations

If you’ve historically had an open communication built on trust, if they start to evade certain line of questions or say things like “why does it matter?” that can be a sign that they’re trying to hide things from you.

While that may not be a relationship, it sometimes is, so consider this concerning—especially if other signs are also present.

The bigger problem here is that your partner isn’t someone you feel like is truthful with you in conversations, or is hiding things from you, then one of the foundational pieces of a relationship is broken between you, and that is a problem that needs to be addressed if you are going to have a future together.

He’s suddenly avoiding your friends and family

Especially if he’s historically been friendly with your circle of friends, your confidantes, and your family, this can be concerning. This means he’s either pulling away or feeling guilty, neither of which are good things, and in either case, you need to find out what’s going on.

So ask him. And trust your gut. If he tells you he’s just being feeling stressed out, for instance, and needed a chance to lay low, trust what you know of him.

He may be telling you the truth – or he may be hiding something. Either way, though, you may be surprised at how good your gut is at ferreting out the truth of what’s going on.

Their grooming changes

This is a huge red flag. If they’re suddenly grooming much more attentively than they have been—especially if you haven’t said anything about their grooming—you should wonder why that may be.

Maybe they’ve taken an interest because it seems to please you, but if that isn’t a plausible explanation, consider who their extra grooming is for. This is especially true if their below the belt grooming changes significantly.

That isn’t the sort of thing most people do unless there is a new partner that has asked them to do so.

Other signs to watch for…

Keep an eye out if his finances have suddenly changed (especially if he says he’s working more, and yet somehow seems to have less money), if he suddenly has a “friend” he keeps mentioning, if he suddenly has a second phone (even if he says it’s a “work” phone, this can be a ruse), if he suddenly can’t ever seem to keep tracks of the plans the two have you have made or is otherwise strangely forgetful, and lastly, watch for changes in his home.

While it’s doubtful you’ll find a pair of panties that aren’t yours, you may well pick up some changes that don’t fit if you keep your eye open if he is sleeping around on you. Most men are not that good at hiding it, so you’re likely to pick up on the signs.

In any case, trust your gut. Oftentimes if you are being cheated on, you will know before you know, if you know what I mean.

And obviously these aren’t the only signs you might see if someone is sleeping around on you, but they are the most common. And on the flip side, none of them are by themselves sure signs he’s sleeping with someone else.

Trust your gut if you think he might be sleeping with someone else, and pay attention to the signs you’re seeing in his behavior.

If he is sleeping with someone else, though, or you otherwise find you can’t trust him? Remember you deserve better. Living with an untrustworthy partner is a waste of your love, not healthy, and wholly unacceptable. You deserve better, so kick that bum out of your life.

How to Be a Bad Girl In Bed: A Guy’s Perspective

How to Be a Bad Girl In Bed

Wondering how to be a bad girl in bed? Join the club. Every girl has heard about the girls who are too nice to land the guy. Or has dated the guy who has made it clear he has a weakness for the bad girls—and has maybe even been cheated on by the guy with that bad girl.

But that doesn’t mean you want to be a bad girl all the time. Nor do guys necessarily want a relationship with the bad girls that can be so much fun to sleep with.

So how do you strike the balance? How do you ensure you can have a healthy relationship, while also giving him that bad girl kick? The truth is, it doesn’t have to be that hard.

Consider these tips from a guy that loves bad girls—and is thrilled his wife is a bad girl in bed while also having all the tools for a healthy, fulfilling long-term relationship.

Here’s how to be a bad girl in bed…

Communicate clearly—and with passion

When we’re having sex with you, we want to know you like it. We want to know how you like it. If you like something, let us know. Moan. Tell us how good it is. Tell us how hot it makes you.

Be blunt with us. Don’t beat around the bush. We’re not good at playing games. And that’s not why we look for a bad girl. We don’t want subtleties or nuance from you, least of all in the bedroom. We want bluntness, because damn, bluntness is sexy.

A few clarifications here: Don’t lie to us. If something isn’t working, don’t tell us it is. If we’re not “making you cum so hard,” don’t tell us we are. Because no matter how dumb we may sometimes seem, we do tend to eventually figure it out. Real passion can’t be faked, and that’s what’s hot: Real passion.

We want to make you cum so hard. But we want it to be real, no matter how good you may be at faking an orgasm, so tell us what works for you, and help us get you there. There is literally nothing hotter than knowing you enjoy sex with us.

(And if you really want to rev us up? Text us your favorite part the next day. Tell us on the phone what you want us to do to you that night. We love when you make it clear what you want from us in the bedroom, both with your words and your body.)

Accentuate the sexy

Look, there is nothing sexier than a woman who knows they’re sexy. Who knows they are a woman, with curves, and isn’t afraid to flaunt those curves.

We men are all about what we see, and there’s nothing sexier than seeing you, in all your glory. Naked, in sexy lingerie—what we want to see is you.

So if you can embrace your sexiness, that makes you all the sexier to us. We don’t care about whatever it is you’re insecure about—we care about you, and your beautiful body! You, naked and confident, is as sexy as it gets.

You want to be a bad girl? Consider letting us watch you masturbate. Not only is it sexy as hell, but it’s a clear indicator to us of what works for you, or it makes for amazing foreplay.

Confidence

The art of knowing how to be a bad girl in bed all starts with one thing: confidence. And there’s a big difference between a woman who knows she’s been told she’s sexy and a woman who knows she’s sexy, and that difference is confidence.

And confidence is sexy. Bad girls are confident. They don’t care whether or not you think they’re sexy; they know they are. And that’s why we can’t resist bad girls—that confidence is intoxicating.

Enjoy foreplay

This isn’t just the willingness to masturbate for us as mentioned previously, it’s everything that makes foreplay, well, foreplay. It means you’re a responsive and emotive kisser, it means you appreciate the way some good dry humping can set the tone.

It means you know the value of a light touch to an erogenous zone. Good foreplay is all about finding what feels good, is fun, and exploring what revs our engine and yours.

Be an explorer

And if you’re willing to try anything that sounds fun, damn is that sexy. I don’t mean crazy kinky, either, not necessarily. Just a willingness to try whatever sounds fun is sexy. It’s naughty.

And it’s even better if you’re the one with the ideas, willing to suggest new things that sound fun—in bed, in the living room, in the shower, in the hot tub, in the park…you get the idea.

Celebrate your independence

Don’t get us wrong. We love the way you need us in bed—but that isn’t the same as being needy.

Bad girls are independent, fiercely so, willing to fight for what they want—and that aggressive independence, and the willingness to do what they need to assert it, is sexy as hell.

Like sex

Bad girls don’t see sex as an obligation, or something to do once in a while, or a mood that strikes occasionally. No, it’s something they like. Something they look forward to. Something they want.

And we love that! We love that you like sex. We love that with you we don’t have to beg for sex. We love that you suggest sex just as often as we do. We love that it’s a natural expression of affection between us, that it isn’t just for special occasions, birthdays, or after we give you jewelry.

But if you’re not feeling like sex, you know what else is crazy appealing about bad girls? A willingness to talk about sex. Tell us what turns you on, what helps you get in the mood—because we want to help get you there.

And even when that doesn’t get you there? Knowing what’s on your mind is going to help us grow closer—which is going to make the sex we have all that much better.

Want to please

There’s nothing sexier than a girl who loves to give good head and can vary what she’s doing based on our body’s response—sometimes even before we realize our body is responding in that way. That desire to really know our body? That’s a sure sign of a bad girl, and oh, do we men go crazy for it.

That means varying your range. Use us for sex, and let us use you. Ride us gently, and let us pound you. The desire to please means noting the emotional state we’re in, and determining what fits the mood we’re both in.

With the right bad girl, it seems like there’s nothing she wants more than to give us the best sex ever, and that is incredibly, incredibly sexy.

Want to learn

You know what else is incredibly sexy? A woman who wants to be good in bed. Because when a girl wants to be good in bed, they end up being great in bed.

Sex is a skill, and it’s something you can study and put work into, whether that’s lots of sex (preferably all with us), masturbation to figure out what gets you off and how, stories, and more.

A really bad girl doesn’t mean being our school girl—or schooling us. Bad girls help us share a mutual education: We learn you, and you learn us, and together we learn how to keep making our sex better and better and better.

Seduce us

There are times we want to use you. There are times we want you to use us. But there’s an art to seduction that the baddest girls know inside and out, and when they use their full charms to seduce us? We melt. There’s nothing sexier.

Give us your full attention

When you’re 100% into us, and we’re 100% into you, damn does that make for some great sex. That’s some good bad girl sex.

When we have the full undivided attention of a bad girl, it is intoxicating. That level of attention is a drug unto itself. And when we have it from you? We give it right back.

Compliment us

If you enjoy something, let us know. We’ll do the same for you. There is nothing sexier than confidence, compliments, and communication.

Why Do Guys Only Want to Sleep With Me?

why do guys only want to sleep with me

You’re looking for a relationship, but keep striking out: It seems like guys only ever want to sleep with you, and you can’t help but wonder why.

After all, friends of yours have found great guys and meaningful relationships, and you know you’re a catch, so what’s the problem?

The truth is, there are lots of reasons why guys might only want to sleep with you – and plenty of them are more a reflection on the guys than they are on you.

It’s Him, Not You

Plenty of guys have realized they can get sex without the relationship, and have decided that’s what they want. Or perhaps they lack emotional depth, and aren’t capable of a meaningful relationship beyond sex.

Lots of guys have come to realize that some women want male attention badly enough that they’ll agree to sex – regardless of whether or not there’s any form of relationship attached to it – because some guys make it clear that’s the only way they’ll give their attention, even if the woman really wants a relationship, and not just sex.

The hard part is that by agreeing to sex, she’s given the guy all of the power in the relationship, without him taking on any of the emotional responsibility of a healthy relationship.

And if a guy can get sex without needing to emotionally connect, well, plenty of guys think that sounds like a pretty dreamy scenario.

Who are You Attracted to?

Yes, plenty of guys want a deep, meaningful relationship – but they may not be the guys you’re immediately most attracted to, because the guys who play the field also tend to be the most immediately attractive, confident, and popular guys.

So if you keep ending up with guys who only want sex, think about what type of guy they are and trust your gut to recognize a player when you meet one.

Know When to Drop Him

Some of the above are beyond your control – you can’t force who’s not looking for a relationship to want one.

But there are some things you can control, so that the men attracted to you are more likely to be relationship material than booty calls.

The first and most obvious is if a guy is a player, or only interested in you for sex, move on.

Yes, this means you’ll likely be dumping quite a few guys, and some of them may be guys you’re really attracted to, but if you want a relationship that isn’t just sex, it’s for your own good – because guys who are just after sex aren’t going to be able to give you the relationship you want.

They’re not interested in that, nor are they likely capable.

Date Men Who Want What You Want

Another obvious but often ignored dating tactic is to focus on the guys who are looking for a real relationship.

And I don’t just mean guys who pay lip service to the idea of a relationship on their Tinder profile; I mean guys who legitimately want to get to know you for you, and are interested in all of you, not just your body.

Be Strategic with What You Showcase

Last but not least, think about how you present yourself and what you emphasize. In a perfect world, you could wear whatever you wanted, walk however you wanted, and guys everywhere would treat you with the respect you deserve.

Unfortunately, that isn’t the world we live in.

Lots of guys are pigs. That’s not a reflection on you. But every woman also knows how to exude different vibes and emphasize different things. If your normal walk emphasizes your hips and butt, or if you make a habit of showing off your cleavage, those are things guys are going to focus on.

No, that’s not fair to you – but it is a reality.

Instead of meeting guys in bars, talk to people at museums, or go birdwatching with a group. Sharing interests with someone makes it more likely they’re going to be interested in you for you, rather than for your body.

Present yourself as an elegant woman, demanding of his respect, and you’re more likely to get it.

Save the Sexy for Later

With that, think about how you date. Flirtation is a good way to show interest, but do you jump straight into sex talk? Yes, you want him to be interested in sleeping with you – but you also probably don’t want it to be the only reason he’s interested in you.

Save the sex talk for after you’ve gotten to know each other a little better, and have determined that you’re compatible as people. When you’ve developed emotional compatibility, the physical connection and chemistry will come naturally with time.

When you focus entirely on the physical connection, however, it can be difficult to build the same level of emotional connection.

Be Picky

Don’t forget that you can be picky! For many men, the difference between someone they would sleep with and someone they would be in a relationship can be quite large – even though for many women, they have to be at least interested in the possibility of a relationship in order to sleep with someone.

In other words, he doesn’t need to see you as a relationship material to want to sleep with you – and very often, if he really just wants to sleep with you, you’ll know because he’ll push things in that direction. You, of course, don’t have to agree to go that way.

For instance, if the only time you hear from him is late at night when he wants some action, you don’t have to respond. In your actions, demand he treat you with respect and attention, and if he doesn’t, cut him loose.

This can be tremendously difficult – but trust me when I say most guys who are interested in a girl for more than just sex are willing to wait, and are willing to do things on her terms, because they want to see where things can go.

The FWB Trap

Don’t let yourself fall into the friends with benefits category if what you’re really looking for is a relationship. This is related to the previous point, but if guys know they can get sex, they’ll take it without expecting anything more.

Guys aren’t too picky when it comes to FWB territory, but they are when it comes to relationships. If you’re letting yourself fall in FWB territory, it’s likely he’ll never look at you as a possibility for anything more.

Be willing to let guys loose as soon as it appears they’re only interested in sex, and stress your other attributes, like your intelligence and interests, and you’ll be far more likely to land a fellow worthy of your time and interest.

In the meantime, don’t take the guys who are interested only in sex personally. Be pickier with your screening process, but remember that these men don’t determine your worth. There are a lot of douchebags out there – and that’s not a reflection on you.

17 Signs He Just Wants To Get In Your Pants

signs he just wants to get in your pants

He’s been sniffing around lately and acting all interested but you can’t help but look for signs he just wants to get in your pants.

After all, this is something that most women of most ages has had to deal with.

The good news is that quite often, if a guy just wants sex from you, it’s easy enough to tell.  The more straightforward ones may even admit they’re just looking for a no-strings-attached sex partner or fuck buddy.

Other times, though, guys might not be so honest with you, because they may think they’re more likely to get laid if they tell you what they think you want to hear.

When that happens, it’s all about listening less to what he’s saying, and putting more stock in his actions.

So what do you look for when you get the feeling that this guy is trying to use you for sex? Here’s 17 signs he just wants to get in your pants and isn’t looking for anything more!

He disappears

When a guy is really into you, they’re communicative. When they just see you as sex, though? Not so much.

He’ll be communicative when he’s looking to get laid, and otherwise disappear when he has other things going on, because he doesn’t value his communication with you except as a means to an end, namely sex.

So if he disappears on you regularly , you can guess how he values you: He just wants to get into your pants.

He doesn’t put in an effort

Similarly, if when he was first hooking up with you he put in a bunch of work to impress you, but doesn’t feel the need to do that anymore? He sees you as a way to get laid, not as someone he’s still trying to woo.

That’s a pretty clear sign it’s about the sex for him, and not the relationship.

He bails, regularly

If he regularly cancels on you, it’s because you aren’t a priority. Maybe that’s a bit blunt, but if he just sees you as miss sexy fun time, and not as someone he otherwise values in his life, he isn’t going to be there except when he wants to get laid.

Honestly? This says more about him than it does about you. It tells you he isn’t ready for any kind of meaningful relationship, or the commitment that comes with those relationships. It tells you he isn’t very mature, and that he doesn’t value anyone’s time but his own.

And you have options. Feel free to tell him that you have certain expectations of him if he wants to stay in your life; there’s no reason you have to put him with his crap, and if he’s not willing to put an effort into being with you, feel free to cut him loose.

He only cares about getting off

Look, if he sees you as a means to an end, and just wants to be with you so he can get off, odds are good he’s not even going to be a very good lay for you. After all, that’s one of the key characters of men who suck in bed.

A romp in the sheets that’s over in minutes is good only for him, and is a pretty clear sign he doesn’t care about you.

If, on the flip side, he’s all about finding out what you like, what drives you wild, and makes an effort to make sure he’s doing what he can to satisfy you?

That’s a sign he might have feelings for you. So pay attention to how he is a lover. Most guys are quite capable of rising to the occasion and taking care of their woman; whether or not they make that effort is a pretty clear sign of how they feel about you as a lover and a person.

He isn’t open with you

Lots of guys get a reputation as being closed-off emotionally, and perhaps with good reason. But just as often, that’s an act. If he really wants to be with you, he’s going to make the effort to connect with you emotionally and build a relationship.

If instead, though, you find that when you try to connect emotionally he just pulls away, it can often be because he isn’t interested in a relationship, or the vulnerability or trust that a relationship requires, because he’s just there for sex.

Lots of “friendly” women in his life

If you notice that he keeps explaining all of these other women in his life are “friends,” that might actually be the case. But it’s just as likely that those are other women he’s either slept with before or wants to sleep with in the future.

Having friends of the opposite gender is certainly possible, but if you note that all of these female friends keep showing up in what seem like inappropriate ways for what you know friendship looks like, it could also just as easily be that he doesn’t seem them as friends — but just calls them friends when he’s with you because he likes having sex with you, and doesn’t want to ruin that.

As always, pay attention to his actions, not his words.

His dates are always last-minute

When a guy really wants to be with you, he wants to make plans to be around you and with you in advance, because it’s something he looks forward to.

If he just sees you as a way to get laid, though, he’s not going to plan that a week in advance. Instead he might text you that day (or maybe the day before) to see if you can do something.

That limited notice? It’s because he’s horny. And might even reflect that plans with other women have fallen through. So pay attention to how he plans his time with you and the effort he puts into seeing you.

He hasn’t added you on social media

If he hasn’t added you to his social media accounts, it could very well be that he’s hiding something. If he’s really into you, he’ll likely try and add you on his social media networks immediately.

If he just wants sex, though, he might not — quite possibly because he doesn’t want you to see other images or connections that might give you an idea that you’re not the only woman in his life.

He might even say something like how he doesn’t add people he’s dating, but odds are good this won’t pass the smell test, so trust your gut here; he’s likely playing the field, and just trying not to get caught.

His stories don’t add up

Related to that, he may well be lying to you, either to impress you (so he can sleep with you) or to keep things from you (so he can sleep with you), but most guys are not very good liars.

We can’t keep straight what we’ve said when or where or to who, and if you’re paying attention, you’ll note some things just don’t feel right or fit right. That isn’t a good sign that he respects or trusts you. Instead, he’s just trying to use you for sex.

You get a vibe

Look, we all have pretty good intuitive bullshit meters, whether we choose to listen to them or not.  If you get the vibe that he’s a skeezeball or playing the field? He probably is!

I was on several sports teams in college. I knew who the sketchy guys were even before they shared all their conquest stories at practice, and most of the smart women I knew got the exact same vibe from those guys.

It might just be a feeling, or it might be the lines he uses, or it may even be the way he checks out other women even while he’s with you — but you know. So if your gut tells you he’s trouble, listen to it!

His phone is off-limits

Pay attention to how he keeps his phone when he’s around you. If it’s upside-down or otherwise out of reach, he might be trying to hide something. If he flips out if you playfully reach for his phone, think about why that might be. W

hen guys are playing the field, they have to keep their ladies from finding out about each other, and the easiest way to do that is to protect their phone.

He always wants to stay in

Similarly, if he always wants to stay in, think about why. Is he afraid someone will see the two of you together? Maybe there’s a legitimate reason — like he can’t afford to go out, for instance — but this can definitely be a warning sign.

He has secrets

If his natural habit when you ask him something is to deflect, that’s not a good sign.

Obviously, for many guys, it takes us time to trust the woman we’re with and open up, but trust your gut on this: If it feels like he’s hiding things, he probably is.

He only sees you at strange times

You don’t get consecutive nights, or the full weekend. Instead you might get a quickie during the week, or a 2 AM bar close booty call.

Those are clear signs he’s just into you for sex. This is especially true if he routinely declines to see you on weekend nights, Friday and Saturday, since if he’s just trolling for sex, those are the best nights for him to pick someone up at the bar.

If you’re a known commodity, but he’s out looking for someone else, that’s a pretty clear sign he’s just looking for sex. It doesn’t get much more obvious than that.

You haven’t met his friend

Or if you have, it’s only been in passing, a chance for him to show off the hottie he’s sleeping with. If he values you and sees you as a relationship material, he’s going to want his friends to weigh in and get to know you.

If he just sees you as a sexy plaything, though, there’s no reason for him to socialize you into the group.

He only texts

Look, texting is easy. But if you only ever get texts from him, that can be a sign of a great number of troubling things.

He might be copying-and-pasting his texts to any number of potential hook-ups. He might be texting while he’s with someone else.

The truth is, when it comes to really getting to know someone, talking on the phone is far more effective. If he only ever wants to text, that could be a sign that he’s interested in your body, not in you.

He avoids commitment

This can be both short-term (making plans a week in advance, for instance) or longer-term. The truth is, he’s not interested in a relationship; he’s interested in sex.

And if that’s all he sees you as, he’s not going to want a relationship down the road, either.

10 Signs He Likes You More Than a Hookup

signs he likes you more than a hookup

Look, it can be hard to know how a guy feels about you, I know. We guys aren’t always the best about knowing our own feelings, much less making them obvious to you or anyone else.

But there are some things we can’t help doing, and as a result, you can tell from our actions if we’re just all about getting in your pants, or if we like you in and out of the bedroom.

Like that, you ask? Here’s 10 signs he likes you more than a hookup!

He gives you his quality time

If he’s with you during the day, that’s a good sign. If he only shows up at 2 am for a bar close booty call, not so much.

So pay attention to what times he gives you, and what he wants to do with you—there’s a big difference between wanting to run errands together and just wanting to dirty some sheets.

He wants you both nights of the weekend

If a guy is seeing multiple women, he’s not going to see you both Friday and Saturday night. Instead, he’ll give you one or the other, so he can keep the other night free.

If he regularly wants to see you consecutive nights, though, it’s a pretty safe bet that he likes you for more than just the sex.

He introduces you to his inner circle

This may even include his family. Guys might introduce a hookup to his guy friends, as a way of bragging about his conquest or a way of showing he can score dates with a hottie like you.

He won’t, however, bring you around to see his family unless he’s interested in developing something more with you. Guys don’t bring girls home to meet their family unless they see themselves staying with her and making something of a future together.

He communicates daily

If he sees you as a booty call or hookup only, he’s only going to text or call when he gets laid. If he thinks of you as something more, though, he’s going to be in much more regular contact.

If he’s texting you daily, and replies to your messages immediately, that’s a good sign that he wants more with you.

He’s patient with you

If he recognizes that his time with you doesn’t have to be rushed, and he’s patient with you as you make decisions, that means he’s willing to move at your pace, which is a pretty clear sign that he’s interested in developing a deeper relationship with you.

If we’re just about the sex with you, we aren’t going to take that time.

He brings up the future

If you note that he brings up things he’d like to do with you in the future, that’s a good sign—because that means he sees you in his future. That might not mean he’s thinking marriage, but it definitely means he sees things with you going somewhere.

He isn’t interested in other women

Look, you can tell when a guy with your with is checking out other women. If he just wants to be with you, he isn’t going to do that.

Similarly, even if he’s a natural flirt, you might notice you’re the only one he flirts with. Those are really good signs that he’s only interested in you.

He’s interested in you

And not just your body. I mean, he’s going to ask questions about you, about your past, your future, and genuinely wants to hear your stories. If he’s really into you, he wants to get to know you, the real you, and that may mean lots of questions, and not just superficial ones like “How was your day?”

These deeper conversations are a clear sign that he wants to build a meaningful emotional connection with you, like in a real relationship, which is about more than just sex.

He wants your feedback

When a guy just wants to know you physically, they’re not likely to care much what you think, as long as you’re willing to sleep with them. When a guy really trusts you and values your opinion and thoughts, though, you know that he sees you as more than just a hookup.

If you find he not only respects your thoughts but values and uses your advice, then you know he’s really into you.

He supports you

When he’s there for you when you need him, that’s a good sign. Most guys if just in it for sex will bail when you need emotional support, but that’s not the case if he sees you as relationship material, or someone he wants to be with longer-term.

The flip side, of course, is that if he’s there for you, and sees you as longer-term relationship material, he’s also going to expect you to be there for him, because this means he trusts you and wants to be with you.

So does your guy show these signs? If so, pay attention to them, because it’s pretty clear he’s into you for more than just the physical stuff. Instead, he wants to build something meaningful with you — even if he isn’t honest enough with himself (or self-aware) to recognize that fact.

So pay attention to his actions more than his words; he may well be saying “let’s keep it casual,” but if he acts like the points above, you know he wants more, even if he doesn’t realize it.